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French Kissing - Faire la bise
I kissed George Clooney. No, really I did
It was a few years ago and I was in Monaco for a business meeting and there was that boring motor race on at the weekend and he was in promoting some film or another where he looks so handsome and gorgeous.
Anyway, I was in my hotel and all these people came in flapping around doing nothing and there he was...all ER and Oceans 11, 12 and however many more and I just got up, walked across and said bonjour, leaned in and he kissed me on both cheeks!
And that is the only time I want to be kissed by a stranger.
Or a friend for that matter.
What is it with the French and kissing anyway?
Yes I know it is common in many European countries but the French are the experts. I once went to the post office to send another registerd letter and there was my neighbour in the queue and yes you guessed, the welcoming kiss took place and then when he heard we had a new house I got the congratulatory kiss and then the farewell kiss....my husband doesn’t kiss me that much and never in public!
My children do it all the time, it is derigeur for teenagers it seems.
I picked my daughter up from school one day and I had to wait while she went from one to another to another of her entourage to farewell kiss. It took so long the regular policeman asked me to move on and when I pointed to my daughter he laughed and, aargh, kissed me!
My favourite however is my husband who was quite pleased when a friend from Marseille came to visit for the first time.
Sport, beer and tales of old dominated Guy’s arrival but he soon changed when Guy arrived with his 3 friends and ensuing bear hugs and kisses on each cheek were not only offered but to my uninitiated eye devoured.
I asked a friend once and was told it was just a hug.
Well hug me then.
I often complained that my cold or headache was probably down to being kissed so much but as my husband pointed out that really didn’t hold up as where we live there is a square where every day the more mature ladies of our village meet to talk and pass the time and if you time it right you can see up to12 women of a certain age who expend probably up to 1% of their remaining years going from one to another kissing quite happily. (I once thought I’d set up a kissing tour to watch these spectacles across the region) and they don’t seem to die of kissing, just old age.
Apparently the Aude is 2 kisses so maybe I’ll tell my husband we’re mov-ing but not to Ardennes (4 kisses) or Corsica (5 kisses).
Actually, if someone kissed me fourtimes I’d think I was about to get morethan a hug.
Oh la la!*
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